It’s been awhile since I’ve blogged so I am looking forward to starting back again. I need this outlet in my life. I think about it daily.
For those following my journey, thank you for your support. I want to start this off by telling you about my year so far and hopefully someone will relate and find inspiration.
I recorded this video to accompany this post because it’s a very emotional thing for me.
In late 2015, I received a job offer from my previous employer who I had worked for seven years prior to having my daughter, Brinkley. When she was born, Kent and I decided it would be best for me to stay home with her and finish graduate school, which I did.
I loved staying home with her and I got to see every major milestone while she was little. It was the biggest blessing!
After graduating in December 2014 with my Master’s degree in Business Administration (MBA), I wondered if I would ever “use” it. It had been a long time bucket list item for me, so of course I was completely relieved to finish the degree. I can be a stressed-student, so it took a lot of dedication for me to finish when I had this beautiful baby girl at home (I went to night class my last semester).
So, when I got the job offer in September 2015, I got really excited. I also had a “big cry” and not the pretty kind. I suddenly felt so much guilt about leaving Brinkley and sending her to daycare. I know so many moms who do it but felt so guilty for wanting to earn the extra money for our family and put my degree to good use.
Prior to the job offer, I had started a health and wellness business working at home, along with personal training online. I was already busy. But the thought of that extra income got me excited for us to really “get ahead” financially. I bought a 2015 SUV and my goal was to pay it off by the end of 2016. My husband and I are on a journey to become debt-free. That’s another blog post in itself.
I thought I could do it all. Have you ever felt that way? Do you take on too much?
My husband knows me so well and said, “Kelsey, you have got so much on your plate. You are going to work full-time, come home for family time, coach women and our business partners- then work out? You always put everyone else first and your fitness will come last.” He was right. But I am pretty stubborn and seem to think I’m Wonder Woman sometimes.
So, after talking it over with my husband and praying my heart out, I started back to work in November 2015.
As many of you parents know, when your baby goes to daycare, they are exposed to germs, sickness, etc. It’s bound to happen sooner or later with school, but of course you want to avoid it if you can.
Long story short, Brinkley and I were sick at least once a month for about six months. If she wasn’t sick with allergies and sinus, I was. We were back and forth to the doctor every few weeks. It was miserable. My husband didn’t quite experience this and I believe it’s because he works in education and has a higher immunity to sickness. It also didn’t help that the building I worked in was being treated for mold from rain flooding. I couldn’t catch a break!
Every time I decided I was feeling better, I would get back in the gym for a couple of weeks or work out at home – then Brinkley would be sick again. And you mamas know that mom-guilt kicks in when your baby is sick and you think about doing something for yourself. Please! All you want to do is stay home, snuggled with that baby.
For six months this went on and I started focusing more on my vitamin intake. I had been inconsistent with taking my daily vitamins up until that point. That definitely helped. Once Brinkley turned two we started giving her children’s vitamins. We haven’t been sick since, thank the Lord!
This was my six month “break up” with fitness. I missed it so much!
After we started feeling better, Kent and I decided to make a major decision to sell our house and move. While we were so excited to move into a larger, but more efficient home, moving and selling a home is a LOT of work. During that two months, I gained about 10 pounds, about 10% body fat and 2 pants sizes.
Reason being, we were going out to eat 3-5 times a week, plus having a few adult beverages here and there. It was out of convenience first, but then I started craving the not-so-healthy stuff. You crave what you consume.
Kent wasn’t really gaining body fat because he was training consistently 5 days a week. Meanwhile, I was not consistent with training and sat at a desk job ALL day. The weight was sneaking back on and I couldn’t let it happen. I remember all too well what it’s like to put on 50 pounds and it’s NOT fun.
My break up from fitness was due to REASONS at first, but then I developed some excuses along the way. It’s important to understand a reason versus an excuse.
When I got home from working all day, I was mentally exhausted. I was leading a sedentary lifestyle behind a desk and eating healthy meals during the day but it wasn’t enough. My evening restaurant meals and 2-3 drinks per week were catching up with me and I did NOT like the person I saw in the mirror.
Something had to give. I was driving an hour in traffic a day…to sit at a desk….I was missing time with my baby….I was craving unhealthy food…..I missed my healthy, fit body and my energy….
I could get online and coach thousands of women on how to lead a healthy lifestyle and lose weight – and they were getting AMAZING results! They motivated me. And here I was struggling to find my way back to the lifestyle I love so much.
Instead of complaining, I had a BIG pep-talk with myself and decided I would start slowly by getting back to the gym three days a week. I even made a home gym in our new house so I had NO EXCUSES. I took one day at a time and one healthy meal at a time. I went back to my original program of clean eating. I started eating every 3 hours without fail, 5 meals a day with 2 of those being meal replacement shakes. I started focusing on drinking a gallon of water a day.
I am almost eight weeks into my journey back to the healthy me and I feel so much better. My energy levels are high, my attitude is better and I can serve others with a full heart.
I am convinced the best project you will ever work on is you. You can’t serve from a cup that’s half-full. I will always have a “chunky girl brain” where I crave the not so healthy stuff, I just have to manage it and not go down that vicious cycle.
We paid off our SUV a few weeks back and I am happy to say that I recently left the 8-5 job. Do I regret going back to work for 8-9 months? No. I believe God has us go through seasons to open our eyes to see what’s really important. I was trading time with my daughter for money and with two other businesses, it just makes sense for me to put my time into those. Luckily, I am in a business that others can do as well, so I feel great about offering that solution to parents struggling with those same feelings.
It’s my first week “off” and I have more time-freedom and no longer feel so stressed about how I will fit my favorite things in my schedule.
I realized that when you say YES to one thing, you are saying NO to something else.
I am thankful for my close circle who supports me no matter what is going on. My husband shares my vision for being debt-free and we look forward to what the future holds with our health and wellness business. I can’t wait to help other families achieve the same.
I hope my journey inspires someone. Just remember, you are never stuck. If you don’t like something about your life, take a step in a new direction every single day until you’ve made that transition.
People sometimes quit or give up when the change isn’t overnight….but nothing worth having happens fast. Stay with it.
If you need a place to start, try my new plan! I’d be honored to coach you.